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Showing posts from January, 2020

Silent Tears

It finally happened. On January 15th my relationship officially ended. Granted, we haven't seen each other since our anniversary,  but it is over. He made me break it off because he wasnt man enough to do it himself.  He said he didn't want to lose my friendship and said I was being unfair for not being his friend.  He was being selfish for not realizing what he was asking.  For not realizing that he had completely crushed my heart and soul and my children's. Another man has walked out on their mom and them. Another man has deemed them not worthy to stay and he thinks it is not fair that I can't and won't stay his friend. As I wrote a letter to explain to him why I couldn't remain friends, I didn't realize I was crying until the droplets hit the paper. Giant puddles formed making my pain visible and very real. I let each one fall and stain the page so that I could start the healing process.  I allowed myself one full day to cry. One full day to realize that ...

2020

Sometimes I dont know how to express my thoughts or feelings. This is the best I can do right now as there is still so much going on. I realize that my role in life is only mother, never wife.  That's just not in my cards.  You said you'd take care of me You said it would be fun You said we'll get married  And be a family You said you'd take care of me Even when things got hard You said no matter what, Two are better than one You said you'd take care of me I never thought you'd run Disappearing like a ghost  Forgetting all the fun You said you'd take care of me Until you realized it was work  All the pain, all the hurt  All because you said you'd take care if me And for once I believed in true love