I was driving today and saw the most beautiful sunset. I realized that the little things in my life that made me happy, I have been ignoring. I need to watch a sunrise and sunset again.
Sometimes I dont know how to express my thoughts or feelings. This is the best I can do right now as there is still so much going on. I realize that my role in life is only mother, never wife. That's just not in my cards. You said you'd take care of me You said it would be fun You said we'll get married And be a family You said you'd take care of me Even when things got hard You said no matter what, Two are better than one You said you'd take care of me I never thought you'd run Disappearing like a ghost Forgetting all the fun You said you'd take care of me Until you realized it was work All the pain, all the hurt All because you said you'd take care if me And for once I believed in true love
I know I haven't come here for a bit. Life just got a some what busy and passing me by. I have just been focusing on working and raising the kids and not much else. I have been going to see my therapist every two weeks and I believe that is going well for me. I am a temporary supervisor at work right now ( for a full 4 weeks ) so at least I have that going for me. Got turned down for two other spots that I really wanted though. So I guess that is my life. Forever stuck with what I am doing until I can find a way to go back to school and afford raising my kids. That's all I got for now.
So here I am, trying to make an effort like he wants me too. And the reason it was hard for me to do so is happening. Ignores my texts, ignores me, gives me one word answers. It is so frustrating. Why try when he clearly does not give a shit. Sigh. God help me, I need strength.
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