Downward Spiral

It just seems nothing is ever going to change. His friend died and instead of letting me be there for him, he is blocking me out more. Yells at me and makes scene's at work.  I feel that I have to tiptoe around everything I say. There is so much that we need to discuss and it just isn't getting there. I am afraid to discuss anything with him this week because his way of dealing with death is all internal. He told me to back off. But yet he gets mad if I don't talk to him right away about things that upset me. It is a loose - loose situation.

I also found at that another one of my friends let the slut who was sending dirty pictures do things to him. This hurt me more than I ever thought it would. I guess it just proves that no matter what, you can't really trust anyone but yourself and your dearest nearest friend. She knows who she is.
I have been acting like it doesn't bother me so I can be there for him during his time of need. But it does bother me and it hurts deeply to realize that "sex acts" had been more important at the time then logical thinking and hurting someone he says he loves. Why can't this whore get out of my life, she keeps coming back up and I am not sure I can handle it.

Please Pray for me and for My best friend. I think we both could use a little love in our lives.