New Start

Today has got to be one of the hardest days of my life. I have decided that moving out would be best for me. I need to be able to grow and learn who I am once more. And learn how to do this alone, with two children. Granted, I know he will never not provide for his children. BUT, I need to know that I can provide on my own as well. We are moving into the same complex. A few doors down from each other. I am scared, anxious, nervous, and am not 100% sure I can do this on my own. But I am sure going to try. I refuse to not know if I can do this.

There have been a lot of tears today. A lot. Then we went to our couples therapy orientation once more.  This one was a bit more promising. It made things almost feel as if it will be okay.

Oh hope, you very fickle scary thing you are. You can either make the world brighter or shred life as we know it to pieces in a swift second.

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